so i had this usb flash memory stick. yup, had, dig? ist kaput.

the only really important stuff on it was about (fifty? a hundred?) hours' work on that pesky webcomic that continually occupies my quiet-time thoughts. every once in a while, i'd get a fantastic idea for thus-and-such, plug it into whatever workstation i was currently employing, jot it down, unplug it. and sadly the last time i copied anything from it was, roughly, summer.

balls; i'm not generally good at dealing with my own stupidity, especially when it could have been so easily avoided.

anyone know someone who knows someone?

… in addition to having a firm command of the above, candidates will be expected to wet their pants and cry for mommy, and afterward question their future careers.

useful texts:
none, you poor sods.

much as I hate to sing all the old clichés:

who heard the alarm only distantly this morning, and slept past his ideal waking time? who over-brewed the tea this morning, turning it into bitter bitter badness that even his ever-loving and -longsuffering wife couldn't choke down? who has a case of the mondays? the answers is me.

it continues. every paper cut I can remember receiving has arrived on a monday. it is a scientifically verifiable fact that, per unit of area of skin affected, a paper cut is the stupidest type of injury allowable by the laws of physics. it must be a monday. I never could get the hang of mondays.

perhaps on the bright side I have figured out what I want for my birthday.

0. 3,4,5-trimethoxyphenethylamine. no not really.
1. booba? kiki? yes yes really, but hard to find for sale. (a friend of mine experiences this. when she closes her eyes, my voice is blue, and round.) the machinations of the mind are an utter enigma.
2. some bloody answers. yes yes really but not likely on the scale I'm hoping for. do they even exist? it is an open question.


days go by and in the end no one knows where all the when went. yesterday's rain is this morning's fog; perhaps that has something to do with it.

or perhaps it's just a sodding monday.

on a lighter note. here are some juicy tidbits that might not be tasty to anyone, but they certainly are to me.


0. I literally wasted my sunday trying to get a) the internet, b) my cable modem, and c) my router to speak the same language. I did everything I knew how to do, and then I did everything I didn't know how to do, and nothing worked for eight hours. in the end I have no idea what I did but now it works, both flawlessly and inexplicably. I hate and love that.


1. you can now play my music! well, you won't be able to hear it, but I'll be able to, and you get to control it through the magic of the webternet.

this will only occasionally work: in your browser of choice type 68 (dot) 185 (dot) 59 (dot) 147 (colon) 1984. if nothing happens it's because I don't have winamp running, which means I'm in bed (which is a rare (and at very least a horribly unpredictable) thing). unadulterated webternet magic by wwwinamp.


2a. WASTE_PUBLIC_KEY 20 2048 antimatt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WASTE_PUBLIC_KEY_END


2b. refer to above spamproof ip address. the one with all the dots.


3. FreeMind is quite probably the neatest piece of software I have ever seen. it is potentially infinite; my fingertips tingle with delight/nerve damage. I hope soon to be able to let you in on some of the things I've done so far. oh what a juicy tidbit. best for last. (java required.)



cheers, luddites.

political drivel lies ahead! ye be warned.

well huh. osama bin laden wasn't captured today. kerry might just pull it out.

but really: whomever wins, we lose.

I do not want george bush be reelected. if george bush were running against 'not george bush,' I think not george bush would win. the problem is I don't want kerry in.

a vote for the lesser of two evils is still a vote for evil, and americans everywhere don't seem to realize this.

I voted (absentee-like) for badnarik, a libertarian. he's a smart guy, as evidenced in many many many recent interviews. if you're sick of the system (and even if you're not), please check him out.

the end (of that).

…

dear coors beer corporation incorporated,

you stated in a recent television advert that your beer was the 'coldest tasting beer' in the world. we beg you to tell us: how can beer taste cold? come to that, can beer taste red? can beer taste loud? we're all very confused.

love,

a billion drunk people

…

tomorrow night I'll be drinking not to remember, but to forget.

remember: that's badnarik. no no, bahd-nah-rik. yes, that's right, less nasally. baaahd-naaah-rik. you've got it.

query: why is it called fasting if it goes so slowly?

har. I really just needed an excuse to tell you I'm fasting. here's why: a week ago I was at the beach working on becoming a fat hippo, and I nearly succeeded. I've worked a few figures and have determined that between friday lunch and sunday breakfast I consumed the recommended weekly caloric intake of, roughly, asia. and so to bring balance and confusion to my stomach, I am making it pay.

<stomach> I NEED OVERTIME PAY OR I'M GOING TO GO ON STRIKE
<matt> I'll show you 'overtime'
* matt starves self
<stomach> SUCK IT, FATTY! QUIT STALLING AND GIVE ME THE 'SPOOKY' LUCKY CHARMS
<matt> you be quiet and stop rumbling or I'll cut you in half like evil jared
* stomach falls silent


explanation: it has been brought to my attention (by her) that evil jared—from the subway commercials—had gastric bypass surgery. it wasn't that he ate nice healthy subway sandwiches and went on an exercise regimen, NO NO, it's that his stomach couldn't hold anything so it didn't bloody well matter what he ate. you disgust me, fraudulent corporate whore evil jared. you are my new swear word. (along with dentist)

in my dreams I write as well as neil, but in the morning I can never remember how.



amends: I apologize for what I wrote below. much as it pains me to admit, it was a moment of angst. hopefully a rare moment of angst. we generally try to do better than that.

where was visibleman when the revolution began?

in bed with swollen glands and a fever. just like I'll have to tell my grandchildren.

visibleman can save you, can save the day, but can't save himself. is there a lesson to be learned here? some massive insight to be gained? how utterly depressing.


and so it begins. I'm going to begin now.