ARRR MATEY! We be sailin the high seas of interrnational finance! AVAST, YE LUBBERRS! Thar be profits ta be made! Gimme full into the wind, and man the shorrt sales, or you'll be swabbin the deck. An' mind the P/E ratio, maggots! Let and put! Let and put!

*boom*

GREAT BLEEDIN EQUITY! We've taken a marrrgin call below the starboard fourth-quarterr earnins level! All hands, preparr for hostile takeovarr! You there! Sell short! Limit orderrs! Dividends, I need dividends! And get me margins up! Aargh, preparr to fire the soybean futurres! FIRRE AT WILL!

*boom*

Arrr, thar's a mighty fine shootin job, ye dogs! Let's batton down the indices and preparr to plunder! Exploit that thar bond marrket! Up the after-hourrs tradin, up the price-fixin, up the marrket timin! 'Fore the day's done, boys, we're gonna own Warrr Street! I mean, Walll Street!

Let's sing it, boys!


Yo ho yo ho, a stock pirate's life for me!
Yo ho yo ho, t'hell with the brokerage fee!
We're gonna show our financial might,
we're gonna own ever dollerr in sight,
an' t'hell with the SEC!





I think I spend too much time on virtualstockexchange.com.

I need to start going somewhere with my life.